
That’s not to say I’m against small talk. In fact, there are
times when it’s enjoyable. The reality is that relationships – work-related or
personal – often start with small talk.
Small talk gets a bad rap just by definition. It’s often defined
as conversation about things that are not of any great importance. It gets
dismissed as fluff, filler conversation, unnecessary. But is it? I think not. Small
talk can set the tone for future conversations and interactions; make us feel
socially connected; make things more enjoyable. And, if you listen more than you
talk, you can learn things.
So why do some people dread it so much? There are many reason,
but one is “not knowing what to say.” Researching
this topic, I found some small talk tips that are a great place to start for
those wanting to improve their small talk acumen. Think REACH.
Reveal something about yourself – where you work, what you do. Explore another’s interests. Shift the
focus to the other person. Ask
open ended questions. One-word responses do not a conversation make. Consciously listen for facts and feelings
that the other person may share. It will provide additional conversation
points. Highlight similarities.
Find out what you have in common and build on it.
Small talk can help you make a good impression, inspire new
ideas, solve problems and lead to lasting relationships. It doesn’t have to be
boring. It’s what you make it.
So, next time you are in an elevator, sitting at a table of
people you don’t know, standing in line at the store, at a business conference or
in a situation where the silence is deafening, give small talk a try. You just
never know. You might even like it.
Posted by MJ Thomas